Long Weekends call for Long Rides

Specifically, a reprise of the 2009 Spring Ride. With Gentle Ben playing the part of Big Luke. It was unanimously agreed that it should be included in the agenda for Spring Ride 2011. And maybe as part of a throwdown stage race some day. It was also agreed that Juan Eppstein's navigational skills should be approached with caution. We always suspected he was wrong back in May of 2009. It has now been confirmed. We still love him though.

Seduction

Just in case anybody is having a hard time getting excited about the upcoming cx season:

U.S. gran prix of cyclocross from Jim Fryer/BrakeThrough Media on Vimeo.

All in the Family

For the past number of vicarious races, the Royal Family has not been the beacon of tranquility their handlers would have us think it is. What else can explain King Andy's inexplicable fall from grace over the last couple of years? Ever since Queen Val started playing around in the pool, his performance in the vicarious races has not been the same. And Prince Dan has been floundering as well. It was pretty obvious, for anyone who dared to consider it, that some sort of discord had infected the royal palace. That may have been good for the rest of us, as it gave some of the lesser lights in the pool a chance to shine. But they have apparently gotten everything sorted out. The Royal Family is firing on all cylinders once again. Dan won stage 4 and Val claimed the victory on stage 5. King Andy has not won a stage since the second day of the Vuelta. But he sits in third overall, behind Dan and Greg the Lunchbucket Kid.

The theme of today's stage was revenge of the bottom feeders. Chris O and KK have been in lanterne rouge territory for the last several stages. But they found themselves atop the podium today. Chris won it with 230 points, just 5 more than KK. This was not good enough to remove KK from last place. But Chris has moved up to mid-pack respectability. Bill finished a bit further back. But his 195 points were still good enough for third place on the day.

In the overall race, we have seen no changes in the top three spots for four days in a row now. The way things have been going, it doesn't look like it will be different any time soon.

Full results and standings here.

Thursday Anticipation

There is nothing going on. It's the calm before the storm. Go do some intervals if you must.

TNR Report

Good times. Some new faces. And some old ones we haven't seen in a while.



It was a working ride of sorts, led by the FGBC's newly constituted R&D Dept. We checked out a few toboggan slides for a new project that is about to commence. This took us, first, to the newly spiffed up Central Park. Their slides do not really conform to our needs. But they did provide an opportunity for some fun.

First, Jonny G tested the grade. It is quite steep.



Little Luc followed this up by attempting to ride the slide. This did not work out so well. His bail, however, we flawlessly executed.



And his bike came to a rest safely at the bottom of the slide.



From there, we headed to Whittier Park. But not before Tristan entertained some young ladies with a crash of his own. The toboggan slides at Whittier were more to our liking. And we left emboldened to carry on with our project.

By this time, some were getting thirsty. So we made our way back to the klubhaus. It was busy. And there was only one server on duty. Cousin Thomas kept her scrambling on account of his need to practice his mad thirst quenching skillz. The Hipster entertained us with tales of his recent trip to Iceland. And there was much talk about cx and how awesome the upcoming season is going to be. Good times.

Earlier in the evening, at the pre-ride race, things did not exactly play out as we'd envisioned. Team FGBC-RRR had a plan. It seemed like a good one. The goal: to deliver either Jonny G or KK to the top step of the podium. Unfortunately, our execution of this plan made the much maligned US led efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan look virtuosic by comparison. There were pedal strikes, skids, and near crashes that led to some early chaos. We lost Jonny G in the effort to regroup. And then KK disappeared with about 4 laps to go. Maybe he forgot to take off his butter belt again. Despondent in the face of this sad turn of events, I very nearly packed it in and settled for 4th. But then a little head popped out of the grass track urn I was carrying in my jersey pocket for good luck and said something. I couldn't see it. But it sounded like Paddy. And it uttered only a single word: "Dude." By which I understood, "That is not behaviour befitting of a Provincial Grass Track Champion." I know enough to know that you should always listen to Paddy. So I gave it one last kick around the final corner and managed to claw my way back to second at the line. Sneakers took the win.

TNR

Last one of the summer. Let's finish it off right.

My place at 9:30 pm.

Who's up for a pre-ride race around the formal gardens?

Victor Victorious

From the desk of our favourite tenor:

On Sunday afternoon the provincial Mountain bike championships were held on an amazing course at Grand Beach. There was a bit of everything in the course. I preferred the flowing single track through the forests to the rock gardens (which were always situated on a hill going up or down/it's almost as if they planned it that way). Brad was amazing, placing second to our favourite olympian, Linsday Gauld, and beating the irrepressible Bill A. in the 50+ category. The only sad part was that I was the only person in the entire field wearing the sweetest jersey in the world. At one point while I was riding a warm-up lap up someone shouted at me " where are all your buddies?" As we were both going too quickly and in opposite directions to have a conversation I didn't get a chance to explain that they were all playing in an ultimate tournament. Any way Hal and his committee did a great job of putting together a fantastic course. Congratulations Hal and Olympia.

Vicarious Vuelta, Stages 1-3

In the end, we made it to 21 teams in the 2010 FGBC Vuelta Pool. Some of them came out of the gate faster than others. Like Chris O, for example, who had 181 points to take the first stage. Too bad about the goose egg on stage 2 though. King Andy won that one, and took over the overall lead, while Chris O took an unhappy trip from first place to last.

But that was before the Lunchbucket Kid and Prince Dan blew the race wide open on stage 3's classics style uphill finish. Greg had 390 points and Dan 385, almost twice as much as Dallas, who finished third. Dan now leads the overall race with 691 points. Greg is in second with 647. King Andy holds onto third overall. He has 486 points. KK did not fare so well on the uphill finish. He forgot to remove the original butter belt and it clearly weighed him down. He finished last on stage 3 and now has a lanterne rouge to go along with his oversized and increasingly corroded belt buckle.

Full results and standings here.

Deadline Extended

We start with a 13 km team time trial. At night. FGBC style. The race starts at 10 pm in Sevilla, which is 3 pm in Winnipeg. Get your teams in by 3pm today and we will still allow you to enter the pool.

Vuelta Pool Watch

11 14 20 teams in the pool so far. There is plenty of room for more. Keep them coming.

Chris H
David S
Jonny N
Jonny B
Matt H
Brad E
Jay S
Greg W
Bill A
LeAnn F
Vic P
Ryan A
Andy L
Val L
Kevin K
Adam B
Dan L
Chris O
Dallas S
Jonah H

Vuelta Pool

Here we go again, boys and girls. The 2010 FGBC Vuelta Pool is open for business. Most of you know the drill by now. If you have forgotten, or are new to this whole vicarious racing thing, take a look at the 2010 FGBC TdF Pool. We'll use the same basic rules and scoring system.

Assemble a team of 9 riders, using the following criteria:

Pick 2 GC men (combined value--the number to the right of the riders name--must add up to 4 or more)
Pick 2 Sprinters (combined value must add up to 4 or more)
Pick 1 ITT man (no values this time around. But note that I have taken my boyfriend off the list. He is off limits.)
Pick 1 Climber (no values)
Pick 1 Stage Hunter (no values)
Pick 2 Wild Cards (no values)

The list of riders is right here.

Send your teams here by 8am Saturday morning.

Good luck.

Thursday Anticipation

1) Vicarious Vuelta

The final grand tour of the season starts on Saturday. It promises to be a wild one. Yes, there will be a pool. Maybe it will be up later today. Maybe Friday. We will see. Either way, rosters will be due on Saturday morning. So start your research now.


2) Does anyone still ride mtb?

If so, you might want to consider the mtb provincials. Being a provincial champion is fun. At least that's what the Little Dicke tells me.


More info here.


3) Or maybe you'd rather head to Altona, the cycling capital of Manitoba, maybe even the world.

If so, then you might want to consider this.


4) Perhaps riding a bike isn't your thing. Maybe you'd rather talk about riding bikes. Or watch other people ride. We at the FGBC understand where you're coming from. We even have something to recommend, namely, this.



It's playing at the Cinematheque this weekend.

Now, go out and make yourself useful. Or maybe throw some frisbees around. That is what most of us at the FGBC will be doing this weekend. We consider it cross-training for cyclocross.

All Hail the Grass Track Czar

Or is it Tsar? Either way, our man Gianni came through once again last night. Big time, as only a czar can do. He put together a killer omnium and gave us an opportunity to experience a variety of track disciplines. One would think the good times would eventually come to an end. But it just seems to get better and better.



The kids kicked it off and couldn't get enough. They were scheduled to do two races, but kept coming back asking if they could do one more. In the end, they did four, including a four lap scratch race that saw them standing up and sprinting basically the entire way. Their consensus favourite was the one that involved cleaning up all the flags. Win and win.










There were plenty of smiles seen on the faces of the big girls and boys too.













The task of crowning the Provincial Grass Track Champion featured a prolonged and hotly contested battle between KK and the Little Dicke. Little Dicke got it started by letting it be known that he was showing up to win. But KK declared it a war with some macho trash talk. He made the first big move in the race too, winning the 2 lap ITT by 2/100 of a second. There is plenty of power that gets generated once those big legs get whirring.



The second round was an Italian pursuit, with teams divided based on the ITT results. This meant KK and the Little Dicke found themselves on opposing teams. That is just as well, since it saved them from having to feign goodwill toward one another. Team Little Dicke came up shooting blanks with a poorly conceived strategy that was even more poorly executed. With his team's easy win, KK found himself with an early two point lead.

The third round was a lengthy miss and out race. Little Dicke couldn't contain his excitement and took off after a couple of laps. Only KK followed, and they eventually lapped the field. Little Dicke took the sprint, narrowing the deficit to just one point.

Round four was a two lap match sprint, with three heats divided randomly based on birthdays. The three winners faced off in the finals. It was Little Dicke vs. KK vs. Rene. Rene was kind enough to lead out. Little Dicke attacked on the first straightaway. KK tried to counter by taking the inside corner. This did not work out so well. His front wheel slid out and he got tangled up with Rene. They both hit the ground. That is no good, especially since the result was that the ankle KK broke last year was smarting pretty good. It took KK a while to get up and rolling again. He conceded two points and now found himself down by one.

The final lap was a handicap race. The kids figured this mean we'd be racing in wheel chairs. That would have been interesting. But we stayed on our bikes. This round was won by grass track rookie, Zach. He narrowly edged out a hard charging Jonny G for the win. KK and the Little Dicke started together and marked each other closely for the full eight laps. They finished 5th and 6th, with the Little Dicke coming out on top for the third consecutive race.

So in the end, the Little Dicke got the job done. He is the 2010 Manitoba Provincial Grass Champion and gets a handsome trophy for the mantle.



KK finished second by two points. Which is exactly how many points he conceded in the crash marred match sprint final. Pondering what might have been, he grabbed the trophy and planted a big juicy kiss on the Little Dicke's prize. Kind of like that one kid at the birthday party who can't stand it when someone else receives the gifts.



One thing seems pretty clear: those two are not through with one another. The 2010 cx season should be a good one. Perhaps some FGBC - RRR animosity will get fueled yet.

Jonny G and Mike G also made a bid to renew the rivalry known as the 2009 FGBC - RRR FGD Challenge. They marked each other all night long and ended up finishing tied for third.

Full results here:



Between the race and the awards ceremony at the klubhaus, we enjoyed a relaxed ride through some of city's new cycling and transportation initiatives. It looks like the ball is finally rolling.

Conversational highlights included a discussion of this video featuring the mayor of our fine city kicking a kid in the face during a recent soccer match and server Lisa sharing with us about her roller derby friends the Murder City Maidens.

GT/TNR

Once again, a two-part Tuesday Night Ride. This will help us get ready for cx.

Tonight we begin with the Grass Track Provincial Championships.

The Poster



The Prize



There will also be prizes for every kid who races. Don't forget to bring the kids. We will make it work.


The Program

1. TT – 2 laps

a. Points: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 1, 1… (every finisher gets 1 point)


2. Italian pursuit (teams from TT results)

a. Seeded from TT, 1/3/5, 2/4/6
b. If an odd number, team with 1 fewer has to nominate someone to ride 2 laps
c. Winning team gets 1 point each


3. Miss and out

a. Sprints every 5 laps
b. Points: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 1, 1… (every finisher gets 1 point)


4. 2 or 3 or 4-up match sprint

a. random draw based on birthdays
b. 3 laps
c. winners go through to final
d. final is best of three
e. Finals: 5, 4, 3, 2
f. Second place in each heat gets 1 point


5. Handicap scratch race – 8 laps (1 mile)

a. Handicap based on TT.
b. Estimated: 1 second = about 100m (1/2 lap)
c. Points: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1


The Location


View Larger Map

Regular TNR shenanigans to follow. 9:30 pm at my place.

Dept. of Alternate Appellation, or A Grass Track Preview

They called him “Der Dicke.” But his given name was Huebner. Michael Huebner. Back in the day, he was a crack racer on the velodrome circuit. There are a handful of world championship medals hanging on a nail in his wall thanks, in part, to some of the beefiest thighs ever to grace a bicycle. Hence the nickname. One might surmise that it arises out of the world of Uli Kunkel and his penchant for nihilistically tinged erotica. In reality, however, it is a reference to those tree trunk sized legs of his—“dicke” meaning thick or fat in Cherman.

Watch Der Dicke (or Hoobner, as Phil calls him) against Claudio Golinelli in the 1990 match sprint world championships:




Here he is today:




This Tuesday another Hoobner will take to the oval track. He’s more than 10 years to the junior of the mighty East German. And his thighs are perhaps slightly less beefy. Call him the Little Dicke, then, or Der Kleine Dicke if you prefer Deutsch. But he’s gunning to become a champion on the track all the same. His goal: to win the 2010 Manitoba Grass Track Championship.

Do you have what it takes to go head-to-head with the Little Dicke? Show up Tuesday at Sir William Osler School to prove it.

Another One for the Sprinters

The inaugural FGBC Fall Classics Pool is very quickly starting to see the Haves sequestering themselves from the Have-Nots. The Haves are the ones with Tyler Farrar on their rosters (esp. Ian, Ali, and Chris D, currently the top three overall). The Have-Nots are those who looked past Farrar when assembling their gaggle of vicarious racers. Perhaps they thought that he'd not yet recovered from that broken bone he picked up in the Tour. They were wrong. Farrar did not win today in the GP Oest France-Plouay. He finished second behind Matt Goss. But he still picked up 300 points for Ian, Ali, and Chris D. Dallas got those same 300 points too. But unfortunately he has no points this season from anyone not named Tyler Farrar, so he finds himself a little further down in the standings. And yet none of these Haves was the victor in today's race. That honour would fall to Chris O. He did it by picking Goss and Yoan Offredo, today's third place finisher. Throw in another 60 points from Alessandro Ballan and it was a 685 point day for the BCC cx machine. Chris D was second with 475 points. And Ian was only 10 points behind him to round out the podium.

Down at the other end of the standings, we are pleased to report that KK and Prince Dan finally made it onto the scoreboard. Darry and Jonny G, however, did not. Three races in and they've yet to score a single point. But theirs were just two of the the 13 goose eggs laid on the day. That's one more than last week. Wierd. Hopefully we'll have more points scored at our next race, Paris-Bruxelles, on Sept. 11.

Full results and standings here.

Highway to Helltona

That was good. Very, very good. Altona isn't known as the cycling capital of Manitoba for nothing. They earn it by putting on quality events. Just when we thought it couldn't get any better, Johnny S came up with AD/DC. A pre-season cyclocross race on a motocross course. Brilliant. Loose dirt and big clumps of clay made for some tricky manouvering. And those hills are a lot more challenging than they look when the dirt bikes go flying over them.

The Cricket pretty much destroyed us all. He easily won the ITT on the kids track. And then he just about lapped the whole field in the cx race. The ABES have the full results. And a more photos too.

A post-race dogfest ensured that we finished off the evening right. I don't see why we shouldn't do this every Friday.

CXMB

With the 2010 cyclocross season coming down the pike, the humble little storefront office known as Cyclocross Manitoba has recently flipped the sign on its door to read "Open." Not only does it feature the Cricket prominently on its marquee. It is also the place to go for local information on all things cyclocross. Like, for example, the fact that Cross Labs begin next Wednesday. Be sure to check in regularly. More news about the season coming soon.

Thursday Anticipation

Cyclocross season is exactly one month away. How awesome is that? Over the next five days, we have two exciting events that will help us all get in a cross mood:

1) Motocross Cross in Altona



Directions:

From Altona; go south on Hwy #30 1.5 km past McDonalds restaurant, Turn east at Road 6 North and go 0.8km…..the track will be on the north side. (Track is approx. 1.5 hours south of Winnipeg)

The Manitoba Motocross Association describes the track as follows: High speed mostly clay track with lots of jumps, doubles, whoops and bermed corners.

Dogfest and debriefing to follow at Johnny S's place.

Dallas needs a ride. Who will give him one? Drop a comment.


2) Grass

From dirt and clay, we move to grass.



Gianni the Grass Track Czar says it will be an omnium with five events. Only the overall winner will be crowned champion. There will be no discipline specific champions. Bring your A game, where A stands for all-rounder.

TNR Report

As far as TNRs go, it was just like spinning a greatest hits album. Kind of like this one, which was spotted in the Secretary's backpack.



Jonny N was in town. He brought greetings from the Seattle chapter. With his memory leading the way, we embarked on a casual tour through some of our favourite downtown area TNR spots. The Forks, the infinity race track, the short cobbled Shangri-La just off the traffic circle, some tunnels, the parking garage, the Portage & Main elks, VJs, and more. Good times.







Back at the klubhaus, Jonny B was waiting for us. He moves to Toronto in a couple of weeks. We will miss him. Good luck Jonny. Maybe we'll see you at cx nationals. But probably not.

At the south end of the table, Jonny N gave us a lengthy rundown of a gathering of anarchists he recently attended in Portland. Interesting stuff. But eventually the discussion turned to cyclocross. There was some talk about a barrier making operation. That will take place at the President's palace sometime soon. We are excited about Altona on Friday. Jonny G and I will be there. It looks like we might be joined by Vic, the Cricket, and (the freshly minted) Dr. John. It would be nice to see others too. Did we mention that it is now free? Free stuff and cyclocross. How can you go wrong?

The tunes were slightly off last night. Not way off. But not on either. It was the poppier side of the 70s and 80s last night. But that fact was easy to miss. We had a ringside seat for a rather energetic and protracted domestic squabble. With all the emotional hyperboles and beer glasses being thrown around, it was difficult to focus on the music.

At the pre-ride crit, we were missing the Cricket. But KK was there to join Jonny G and me. Once again, we set out with the goal of sweeping the podium. Once again, we failed. It looked promising when we managed to shrink the 6 person field to 4 after the first few laps. But we were unable to shake Sneakers. That guy is cagey. Or perhaps we were just a tactical disaster. That is more likely. We really have no idea what we are doing. But we have fun trying. In the end, Sneakers was kind enough to lead me out for an easy win. KK was third and Jonny 4th. Next week is the Provincial Grass Track Championships. So we have one more crack at a podium sweep on August 31.