Saturday, June 30, 2012

Meet the Competition

[Update] Three more teams added. That brings us to 65. Please check the list to make sure you're on it.

I don't expect everyone to print out the list of teams and consult it daily like King Andy does. But then again, there is only one King in this pool. If nothing else, take a look at your team and make sure it is correct. If not, let me know ASAP.

Good luck! This should be fun.

The Pool is Full

In the end, I think there were 63 teams submitted. I will try to get them posted tonight so you can check them over. The Dark Side's Dept. of Low Stakes Gambling is a busy place right now, so it's possible someone got lost in the shuffle. That would be a shame.

It will take a little while to get everything set up. Thanks for your patience.

While you're waiting, make sure to go back and watch what my boyfriend did today. Maybe several times. Was that a thing of beauty or what? It's so good to have him back.

Friday, June 29, 2012

TdF Pool Watch Update

[Update - 11:31 pm] Last update before bed time. Rhonda, Graham, Karen, Stewart, and Sam bring the total to 55. There are lots of vicarious racing rookies in this pool. We will get around to the hazing discussion later. More importantly, where is the rest of the Dark Side?

[Update - 10:55 pm] We have reached 50, thanks to David, Jenna, Daniel, Jay, Phillip, Cindy, and Andrea.

Just got back from supper at the Half Moon drive-in. If not the perfect pre-TdF meal, a Saturn burger and fries is surely high on the list.

Eleven more teams since the last update: Chris, Elisha, Catherine, Todd, Leonie, Jonny G, Randy, Daniel, Charlene, Val, and Andy are in the pool. That brings us to 43. See the full list below.

Less than 9 hours to go!

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

But it will make an appearance on the Dark Side's blog.

Patrick Leaman, one of our vicarious racers from the Honorary Captain's neck of the woods, has scored us a second pair of socks to be added to the prize pool. These socks come courtesy of Revolution Wheelworks. They are known more for their kick-ass wheels than their socks. But the socks are more in keeping with the other prizes we have lined up for the 2012 FGBC TdF Pool. Make sure to click on the link to check them out. And the next time you're looking for a wheelset, it would be a good idea to keep them in mind.

The socks will go to the highest American finisher in the pool.

Thanks guys!

TdF Pool Entry Watch

[Update: 1:37 pm] Six more teams have signed up. Say hi to Greg, Troy, Bill, Teagan, Jason, and Hal. That brings us to 32 teams. Keep spreading the word. There is still lots of room in the pool.

It's almost as exciting as the TdF Pool itself.

The deadline to get your teams in is less than 24 hours away. This means that the biggest cycling spectacle in the world is also less than 24 hours away. How sweet is that? You wouldn't want to miss out on the opportunity to participate vicariously in the Tour, no matter how silly and contrived it may be.

So far, we have 26 teams in the pool. Surely we can do better than that. Anything less than 50 would be very disappointing. Also, we need more women and children. There are sure to be more teams submitted between now and 7am tomorrow morning. We will post updates throughout the day for you to keep track. Because, well, it's way more exciting than working right now.

Chris H
Jonny B
David S
David H
Chris Y
Chris O
Jonny G

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Another Prize in the Pool

Aaron Check of Happy Fun Racing has generously donated another prize for the 2012 FGBC TdF Pool--a free entry to their mtb race on July 29. The winner now gets to choose between the sweetest socks in the world and what some have called the sweetest trails in our fine province. Second place gets whichever prize is left over. If this should end up in the hands of someone living in Virginia or North Carolina, or anyone else who isn't going to do the race, it will just get passed down until it is grabbed by someone who will actually use it. The socks, however, will be mailed if necessary.

Actually, I think there is another team called Happy Fun Racing in Raleigh. So in case the NC folks are confused, this one is based in Brandon, MB.

Thanks Aaron!

If anyone else out there wishes to donate a prize, I'm sure we could accommodate your desire.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

2012 FGBC Tour de France Pool

The pool is open for business. Good luck and have fun!

The Rules 

1. Pick a team of nine riders from this list and send them here. Your team must be submitted before Saturday, 7am Winnipeg time (CDT).

2. Entry into the pool is free. Save your money for the new FGBC CX Skinsuit.

3. The winner gets a pair of FGBC wool socks. You have to drink a celebratory beer from them.

4. The pool is open to anyone. Feel free to invite others to participate.

5. Points will be awarded based on the scoring system below (scroll down).

6. Any rider who is disqualified from the race for a doping violation (during the race) forfeits all his points. If he survives the race and gets busted later, you get to keep your points.

Picking Riders: Here's where a few people tend to struggle. I won't name names. Nor will I correct ineligible entries. If you want to play, pay attention to the following criteria. It is really not that hard. But it does require some basic math skills and an understanding of simple logical operators (esp. "and," "or," and "not"). Past experience suggests that Criterion #3 will be especially tricky to navigate, since it requires the simultaneous negotiation of two different lists. But I'm sure you can do it.

1. Pick two GC riders. Their combined values (the numbers to the right of the rider's name) must add up to five or more.

2. Pick two sprinters. Combined values must add up to five or more.

3. TT Men and Climbers - Pick one rider from each list. Their combined values must add up to four or more.

4. Pick one stage hunter. No math involved in this one.

5. Pick two Wild Cards. There are no values assigned to these guys. So again, no math. Just pick any two from the list.


Individual stages: 150 125 100 90 80 75 70 65 60 55 50 45 40 35 30 25 20 15 10 5
Final GC: 600 500 400 350 300 275 250 225 200 175 150 135 120 105 90 75 60 45 30 15
Final Points Classification: 120 90 60 40 20
Final Mountains and Classification: 120 90 60 40 20
Final Young Rider Classification: 120 90 60 40 20

Tuesday, June 26, 2012


First TNR of the summer.

9:30 pm at my place.

Another stupid video?

I thought this was going to be another stupid video of a women riding around on her bike to music but it gets good at 2:20 and then at 2:39 and then at around 4:00.

Monday, June 25, 2012

2012 FGBC Tour de France Pool

We will be open for business soon. Very soon. We are still waiting on Lampre and Liquigas to announce their starting nine. Those Italians, they take their own sweet time.

Check back often.

Friday, June 22, 2012

Thursday Anticipation

Only three more weeks until the event some of us like to think of as Spring Ride II. The 24 Hours of Falcon Ridge is really just a larger, more public, gender inclusive, and family friendly version of our annual celebration of mountain biking and good times.

Registration is now open. Get your teams figured out and get signed up right here.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

TNR Report

Once again, weather was a factor... as we gathered at the secret meeting spot, the rain began to fall... so the most direct route to the klubhaus was taken. That would be the end of report if we hadn't had special guests.
The Duester managed to find time in his busy family schedule to join us, so the RRR boys held caucus at one end of the table. It was a joyful reunion.
Dan continues to surprise. Beyond his difficult journey between jerseys, he finds time to host complete and wonderful strangers through Tim was his guest, and therefore our guest. Tim is from Sheffield in the north of England, and began his trek in San Francisco in April... up the coast, and then across Canada to us...
Tim tells tales of the road. Duester's nose sticks out past the BF.
The journey will continue to St. John's, Nflnd and then down the east coast until the rental folks are out of his house in November.
The nice news is that he has really enjoyed the prairies a lot.
He is blogging here:
Tea for Tim
Thanks for the fine visit Tim.

Finally, our most intrepid electrician rolled up, wet from the rain. That was nice.

In other news, the Hipster's bad attitude toward mopeds makes him slightly less hip than last week.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Cousin Thomas is Awesome

We all knew that already. But in case there are some doubters among us, click here to have your faith restored.

Just make sure you have swallowed your drink before you press click.


I am out. I have a date with America's best bar band.

I'm sure you will be able to figure out a sweet ride. Just be sure to watch out for dragons.

Monday, June 18, 2012

An Open Letter to Race Organizers

It has now been over a week since the mtb race in Pinawa. And yet there is still no sign of results. We know you have busy lives, just like the rest of us. But posting race results in a timely fashion would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

TNR Report

Short and sweet edition:

We found the U of W Bike Lab

Posted some posters

Saw the Secretary ride a bike for the first time in a long time

Took a break

Ate some poutine

Experienced the leadership qualities of the Awesome One
We also experienced the best collection of tunes in a long time. Maybe ever. And we did some planning for the CX Worlds Road Trip, listened to the Secretary romanticize about broken down VW vans, heard a report on the Flyover Project and other exciting DarkCross initiatives, and probably a did few other things as well.

Good times.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012


Bring your staple guns, boys and girls. We have some 24 Hours of Falcon Ridge posters to put up.

9:30 pm at my place.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Tales from the Crit

The Hipster raced his first crit last Tuesday. He was first in the Fully Bearded Category.

After the KOM season is finished, we expect the Dark Side will be better represented.

Photos courtesy of Woodcock Cycleworks.

Thursday, June 07, 2012

Thursday Anticipation

1) I booked a hotel room for the CX Worlds in Louisville. The whole family is going. It would be very awesome if others were to join us.

2) Speaking of cx, the DarkCross hype machine is starting to purr. Last year was alright. We are working on some new initiatives to make this year even more alright. Perhaps the biggest of these is the top secret assignment currently referred to by the code name "The Flyover Project." We're looking into fireworks as well. That seems to be a fitting way to close the evening. And we are also exploring the possibility of adding wrecked cars to the course. They were notably absent from last year's course. That is a wrong that needs to be righted.

3) A little less far into the future is a  24 hour race and party that everyone should make sure to attend.

New team time trial strategy

We would be unstoppable!

Surreal Cat Report

Gianni knows how to put on an alleycat. We no doubt disappointed him with our inability to grab the surrealist ball and run with it. But it was a good time nonetheless.

The three teams were as follows:

Team Breton: Lyle, JP, Daniel
Team Magritte: Jonny G, Vic, Mark, KK
Team Duchamp: Brad, Craig, Vanessa, Chris

It was close, with all three teams arriving at the klubhaus within a minute or so of each other. The Secretary was on hand to judge the quality of the responses. He seemed to think none of them was especially good. But he deemed Team Duchamp slightly less bad than the other two. The resulting bonus points bumped them onto the top step of the podium.

This meant that the Hipster failed in his bid to capture the 2012 Nordic Cross Title. Except that the customary Sprint of Darkness was called. The Hipster won that one. Easily. And so he wound up being crowned the Nordic Cross Champion after all. Congratulations Mark. That was well deserved.

Token photos of the race:

The Race Director forgot his moustache for the pre-race rules discussion.

It is good to have the old KK back.

Many sides. And yet none.

Elephants can make you dead . . . just like that guy.

This is not a toboggan slide.

At the confluence of now and yesterday.

Who knew this water came from the Indian Ocean?

His was a greatness to behold.

A hill made of garbage? That's kind of surreal.

Something about cyborgs.


Tuesday, June 05, 2012


Gianni came through. Here are the rules:
  • There will be three teams, arranged by birthdays.
  • Teams ride as a group and must finish together.
  • No supplies necessary. Everything other than wit and wisdom will be supplied.
This will bring the Nordic Cross Series to a close. The current standings are as follows:

Chris 103
Mark 102
Jonny G 95
Graham 76
Vic 71
JP 68
Craig 66
Darryl 60
Lyle 51
Luke 46
Brad 28
KK 25
Penner 24
Andrea 18
Unger 16
Dave E 15
Brandon 14
Kelly 14
Tom 13
Daniel 12
Vanessa 11
Colin 9
Tomek 8
Bill 7

Friday, June 01, 2012

Saturday Morning Road Ride

Terry is riding to St Adolphe and possibly beyond, leaving at 10am. Drop a comment or send him an email if you're interested.

Christmas in June?

We never finished the Nordic Cross season. That is not right. Especially since the Hipster was poised to grab the overall title on the last race of the season.  Also, the BF has a new trophy he would like to debut.

Remember March and how warm it was? It has been cooler than that lately. So we are justified in imagining that it is still winter.

Does anybody want to plan a race for this Tuesday so that we can get this thing settled once and for all? It need not have anything to do with winter or snow. But it does need to be awesome.

Let us know.